New year - not so new me!

Christmas was wonderful - my children were grateful and my in laws were supportive. I felt like the break up north was a break from my worries. I was free. 

I  am determined not to start the New Year plagued with the same worries as I had last year. Not enough money - too many things to pay out - no way to make more money. However my new years resolution - "Only worry about things you can influence" has meant I haven't cried every day! 

This quote is so true so I can't afford to sink to the pressure of worries about things I can't change. 
I am working as hard as ever at work and enjoying my class. Really I think my class is the only thing that keeps me sane. I have thrown myself into organising SATs prep and smaller group work and think we should have everything sorted for the coming term. I hope so! 
Christmas was good - a blessing - but it made me long to be in a position to move back up north far more then I had before. The atmosphere, the places, the people - I miss it all. With no real extended family of my own down here my in- laws stepped up which was so reassuring. If the absolute worst was to happen and my husband was not taken onto a permenant contract at his work we wouldn't be homeless - we could move in with the MIL and survive. Obviously it is the last thing we would want to happen but its a security net that exists and for that I am so grateful. It has given me a goal - something to aim for. Keep scrimping, keep paying things off and we will finally be in a position to move back up north. 

We have budgeted to within a penny and we can just make it. I have opted out of the pension scheme at work - theres no way I will survive to pensionable age if I don't do something to make some more money now and between hubbies shifts and my day job it makes taking on part time virtually impossible - either through conflict of interest (I need all the hours I have to be the best teacher I can) or logistics (waitressing/bar work would rely on regular hours which with hubbbies shifts changes is impossible.) so, plough on tightening the belt as frequently as I can. 
I am hopeful that 2016 teaches me to be humble and grateful for all I have - I know I am defiantly thankful for my husband, my boys and the roof over my head far more then I was for the vast majority of 2015. I have felt the kindness of others through freegle and gifts of time, money and kindness far more then I had when times were good. I got more curtains for my house from another kind stranger on New Years Eve and cried in the car for a good half hour in gratitude for their kindness. My second new years resolution is to remember - everything happens for a reason - perhaps this happened to bring you into my life? 

What are your new years resolutions? Could anyone suggest any money saving/making tips I could try out? 
Thank you for reading my blog - it is something that has kept me going when I could have broken. 

For the princely sum of £100 - Santa's coming!

So I took my £100 voucher and sorted gifts from the big man for our boys. I lucked out at Debenhams toy sale and managed to get...

As the main gifts for my two and some other little bits and pieces. I got a Dior lipgloss for my 11 year old niece and a batman egg cup and toast cutters...

There were some pound shop purchases to round off but overall have to say I am chuffed with my gifts. This plus the recycled gifts for the mother in law (Spiced Winter Berry reed diffuser), sister in law (candles), great uncle and aunt (marks and spencer chocolates) and my nanna (more Marks and spencer chocolates) means I have pretty much everyone covered. I got the brother in law and hubbie a Nivea shave set along with the niece a cute Fifi Lapin manicure set on their 3 for 2. 

My family will get some salt dough decorations the boys made - frankly I don't have a penny left and its largely their fault so hey ho - homemade and wholesome it is. 

I feel like I can settle into Christmas a little - just got to keep a real tight reign on the finances to ensure everything gets paid this month! 

Got some more fabulous news from freegle and am off to collect some curtains tonight! Heres hoping they are big enough! 

Passing it on

Now I would consider myself to be a generally nice person. I would struggle to say the last time I had a row and I always aim to treat others as I would like to be treated.  I bite my tongue to avoid hurting others and grin and bear it when I have to step up because others don't even though it very often piles the pressure on. However recently karma has been a treating me like a b***h! I had to move out of my family home with my smaller family with no notice or funds through no fault of my own. I have been left to pay for a Christmas for two children who are old enough to know with no money and, despite having windows at upper deck bus height, on a main road, have no money left for curtains. I have to walk and bus to school because my OH has the car for his work and have made a stretching a food budget a hobby. I have to admit - for the first time in the last ten years at least - I have found myself thinking "WHY ME?!!" Even whilst thinking this there has been the simultaneous thought "don't be so selfish there are people who are ill, or who have children who are ill, or you could have ended up in a shelter" then I'd feel guilty for thinking it and try to not do it again until I was soaked at the bus stop or shouted at in work.
Today that changed. I will no longer think "Why me?" because I had my first bit of good karma back to balance out the bad. With no money for christmas decs the cards the boys received from school have been making do on the window sill but now... thanks to someones amazing generosity (and the power of fragile)... we have a CHRISTMAS TREE!!! Its huge and fabulous and up ready for the boys to see in the morning. Praise the lord the tides are changing.